The graduates listed below are in no particular order, although we understand that Britney Spears graduated with Summa Cum Laude honors and a 3.96 GPA.

 

Paris Hilton: Beauty School Administration (but she dropped out)

 

George W Bush: Linguistology and Inventiology (double major)

 

 

Kevin Federline: Investment Banking with a focus in Gold Mining

 

 

Nicole Ritchie: Food Science, Health and Nutrition

 

 
Ashlee Simpson: Theatre, with a focus in Mime

 

 
Mel Gibson: Theology. Graduated with Honors. Thesis: Diversity in Religion

 

 

Tom Cruise: Biology and Psychology (double major) 

 

Tony Blair: American Studies and Diplomacy

 

Mark Foley: Computer Science, with a concentration in Internet Privacy

 

 

Kim Jong Il: Choreography; concentration in Mass Crowd Coordination

 

 
Britney Spears: Apparel and Fashion Design. Minor in Early Childhood Development

 

The institutions of higher education that granted degrees to the above celebrities declined to comment. Apart from the University of Scientology, whose PR department informed us that, at their next Commencement, they will present Tom Cruise with honorary Doctorates in Chemistry and Psychotherapy.