I'm sick of netsquatters, copycats, and redirection sites. It seems like every second website I search for causes me all sorts of grief with the content filter at work.

Interested in the World Swimming Championships in Melbourne this year, you say? If you're at work, make sure you remember that Melbourne 2007 takes place in Australia and add the .au to that .com address, or the p@rn filter for the office will go nuts.

But it is the brand name confusion that causes me the most grief, and I suspect a whole lotta grief for some of the groups concerned. That's why I advocate the "ten year-old kid test" for naming things.

Wondering why sales of the Mitsubishi Pajero tanked in Spain and South America? A ten year old Spanish kid could have told 'em that no one would want to drive around in a car named "Wanker," but only after the same kid stopped rolling around on the floor laughing.

Got a bank you want to rebrand and thinking of calling it Bank West, you say (yep, a real bank in Western Australia)? Hmm...let's see, move the W and the B and hey presto, it now spells "public relations disaster." A ten year-old kid on the payroll would have prevented that little fiasco.

But maybe it would have taken someone a little bit older to help them to understand why using the Village People's "Go West" as the theme song for the bank adverts was a bad idea. Who knows, maybe they thought using a gay anthem would attract the so-called "pink" dollar.

That same kid could also make some money consulting on the naming of some organisations.

Note to self and others: Make sure, when conducting research on terrorist groups in South East Asia, that you type out the name of the Moro Islamic Liberation Front in full before commencing your Google search. MILF, the small but violent group from the Philippines, is going to have a heck of a time with their online recruitment effort if they ever decide to move beyond the jungle.

However, it makes me feel warm and safe when I think of all those angry young (and strongly religious) potential recruits getting side-tracked by photos of hot older women in sexy poses.

With a hottie like Diane Lane on the side of Freedom and Liberty, we are sure to win the war on terror.