Let me just start by saying that I could technically be fired for including too much detail or for disclosing the wrong details to all of you in the form of this ultra P.O.ed article that I am about to write.  Whenever I feel I have potentially crossed that line I will clue you in with, "(oops...)."  Let me start by asking you a question.  Have you ever been pissed on?  Literally? (oops...)

So as the title should have suggested we will be discussing the salvation of the children.  But not the starving third world children.  Oh no.  I'm leaving that to the more formidable powers of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolee.  See for the last year I have been working at a group home where I have been given the ultimate task of saving AMERICAN children. 

Now that I have revealed the nature of the subject a few of you might be thinking, "ahhhh yes, this subject is why I became a liberal."  I am about to lecture you on why you are currently my worst nightmare.  Don't worry, you're hand in hand with the evil conservatives on this and they are next up to the plate.  

Many of the kids I have been working with in the last year come from Madison, Wisconsin.(oops...) 
How liberal is Madison?  Let's just say they're the reason Russ Feingold; the ultimate liberal; has scraped by in his last two senatorial campaigns.  Why am I so angry?  Imagine you are dealing with a kid who was so neglected and abused that when his doctor (PhD Psychology) held him on her lap to see what his response would be, he went virtually catatonic. (oops...) 

Now imagine that the liberal judge has ordered the child removed from his home; by the way that's because he began violently acting out and his worthless mother(oops...) got scared and finally called the police on him one too many times; with the intention of rehabilitating child AND mother so that they could be RE-UNITED IN THEIR HOME.  Now that might sound really good to all of you.  Ah yes let's save the home, we don't give up on people, everyone can be saved, a child should be with his/her biological mother, that is the best possible option no matter what the other options may be.  Ya it sounds good.  But it doesn't work.  It is very hard to get these kids to change and they are at an impressionable age.  The parents are not. They are who they are, and it's not like these are small issues.  In most cases they have mental health issues that have for some reason not been addressed or simply can't be. 

Here is something else the liberals have completely screwed up.  When the kids are terrorizing my facility, attacking each other, destroying the house, attacking the staff, we finally have to call in the 'Five Oh' for some backup.  Not only is this a complete waste of manpower but they all look at us like a bunch of idiots for not being able to handle the situation ourselves.  They really don't get it.  The kids are usually done acting out by that time because they have achieved their goal.  The police had to be called and they get their vacation at the Juvenile Detention Center. 

Why the hell is the Juvenile Detention Center a vacation!?  For one thing they know they can't screw with the staff there; JDC can actually use padded lockdown rooms unlike us; so they don't act out there.  They also don't have to deal with things like chores or treatment goals, or adults who know them and therefore don't buy into their BS that they learned from manipulating parents, teachers and social workers.  Those are all things that they have to deal with at our facility.  In fact they are in no way responsible for much of anything while they are there.  They just sit around and brag to their little JDC buddies.  "Hey I bit staff so and so today."  "Ya I broke that bitch's car window 2 months ago when I lived there."  "You used to live there?"   "Ya, if you really want to fuck that place up here's what you do...." 

What do the liberals have to do with this?  Well...we don't want Jail to be too rough on the kids right?  Well guess what? I for one do, and that's because I actually know something about these kids and why they do what they do, and if at the mere mention of a police contact these kids had a reason to stop what they are doing, we would all be doing them a HUGE favor.  Kids, especially THESE kids, need help figuring it out.  You know, like whether or not to crack someone in the face with a baseball bat during an athletic outing.  You can't sit there and explain the logic to them right then and there.  Their brains don't work like that.  They need a really profound reason not to do it because, guess what, they already bypassed the, "well if I do this I will just be in more trouble and I will never get to go home or get placed with a family," logic.  At that point they are just flat out angry and they want to act through their usual process, which they developed while living in their broken home, because that's what seems right to them.  You have to talk to them about it later or let the therapist do it during sessions. To ge the kid to stop...you need to give them an immediate reason.  It's called direct consequences.  So Juvenile Detention should be a lockdown situation.  It should be a no contact...crappy food...mean staff who yell a lot....this is what jail will be like when you're an adult if you don't knock this shit off kid kind of situation.  Instead they learn things like, "I can have 52 police contacts in 5 months before these dipshits decide they have to put me in lock down every time I come to JDC."  It's ridiculous.

So a few of you others might be thinking, "ahhhh yes, this is why I'm a conservative."  Oh you poor dumb fools.  Guess what.  The Conservatives in the trenches seem to agree with the liberals on all things juvenile, and that's why you are also my worst nightmare.  Because here is what your Wisconsin colleagues figure.....  Yes.  Let's re-unite them in the home.  After all.  Uh.  We really don't have the budget to....
1. Place a kid in a group home indefinately.
2. Place a kid in a mental hospital because he/she is just flat out CRAZY.  Yes...crazy people do come from somewhere folks....
3. Keep a kid in JDC for more than 45 minutes.  Not kidding.  One county in the area, guess where, Madison, will only hold a kid for 45 minutes.  Why?  Because the liberals don't want the kid to feel like he/she is in prison and the conservatives don't want to waste too much money.
4. Keep paying for this woman's groceries....so maybe somebody can fix her and she'll get a good job and suddenly become a good mother. 
5. Hire enough social workers so that they aren't all looking for the easiest way to clear a case.  And I shit you not.  Because of that method I have seen a kid go home who has actually stated that he will kill his mother some day, and trust me when I say he was NOT kidding. (oops...)  I have also heard of a kid who was placed out of his home because he was sexually abused, and had in turn sexually abused other kids.  Well....he took some class...got to go home...and sexually abused like 10 more kids. (oops...) 

THANKS conservatives and liberals for keeping our kids safe....idiots.

Here are some hard realities folks, and you'll just have to trust me when I say that
your political heroes are doing you absolutely no good on this topic.

#1. Severe child abuse or neglect should result in a minimum 15 year imprisonment.  Why? Because in cases like the ones I am talking about they are OBVIOUSLY guilty and nothing happens to them.  For 15 years they can't screw up their kid anymore.  For 15 years they can't have MORE kids.  Child neglect and abuse is the single greatest detriment to society because it produces socially broken and dangerous kids.  Do I feel sorry for them?  Yes.  But what's important here? Trying and failing miserably to change the parent and the kid or protecting the rest of society from further devestation?
#2. Some kids have reached a point of no return.  I'm not saying they can't be productive and happy. But they are going to have to be productive and happy under absolute supervision for the rest of their lives.  A supervised community could work in many such cases.  Trust me this is better for everyone.
#3. Often times the people in these little stories with the most victims are actually the kids.  Which is why this crap is so important.

Listen.  I know what I'm talking about.  (pre-emptive oops...)  I've been bitten, punched, kicked, spit on, pissed on, pooped on, more or less sexually assaulted, and inadvertantly in the way of dangerous flying objects.  I've read the files and dealt directly with the parents.  And the truth is I have a college degree and I could work at Taco Bell out in Seattle and get paid more to screw up Jane Copland's order.  I would also have about 1/30th the amount of stress.  I LOVE working with these kids because we've honestly been a positive influence on many of them and there have been more average to good days than the flat out scary ones that I outlined above.  But the system doesn't work...and it doesn't care...and it doesn't pay to keep people who care around.  That's just one last way in which the politicians of all classifications have failed.  

So we don't all want to save the kids or what?  The end of my two weeks is Sunday.  Am I disappointed?  Ya.  The group of kids we currently have are good kids.  Messed up but good.  I am kind of attached to them.  But in the end I'm just like everyone else.  I'm 27 years old...and I need to get paid more.  Sorry kids.

Thanks Drivl, for letting me rant.